Thursday, April 22, 2010

Culinary Good Deed

Well, Happy Earth Day. I celebrated today ... I didn't celebrate. But I did a culinary good deed. Haven't heard if these before? That's because I just made them up. Feel free to adopt the practice. Spread culinary knowledge wherever you roam.

Details? Happy to oblige.
I was at Safeway because Sam was screaming "grapes" all morning and I just wanted him to stop. I thought about going to Whole Foods so that I could also get some caffeine, aka, the elixir of life, or my best friend, but I hate WF and I didn't want to see how much organic grapes cost. I know. I need to buy everything organic. I know. But I went to Safeway anyway because I also wanted oil-cured olives and I didn't want to pay $20 for a jar, which is what I was certain to pay at WF. So, I'm at Safeway, which didn't even have said olives, by the way. I got them there before, too, what in tarnation is the big idea? Okay. They had one eensy jar for $8.39! of kalamatas and I wanted mixed. Curses. AND, Thursday must be Safeway's senior discount day because the place was packed with blue hairs. Lord! The aisles were clogged with people moving quite slowly, which normally I don't mind, but we were getting close to nap time and I just needed to get the darn grapes for a snack; also, I wasted a lot of time reading 28 jars of olives to see if they were oil-cured. The fun thing about going on days like this (U's Senior Discount Day is Tuesday) is that I get involved in lots of conversations ... because I'm so young and pretty with such supple skin. Ha! Because I have a toddler. This old guy clogged up the works in the exit lane because he needed to talk some nonsense to Sam, who is a good sport and seems to really value the older set. So I'm at the grapes alongside an elderly woman. We're both squeezing the red grapes to see which package to get. I was finding a lot of mushy grapes in sticky bags, so I move over to green.

Me: Hm. They are all a little soft, aren't they?
Lady: And dusty.
Me: That is actually the protective coating on the grapes. All grapes are dusty. It keeps them fresh longer, so you should wash them only right before you want to eat them.
Lady: (interested and definitely thankful voice) Oh, really.

At this point I paused, steadying myself for the "thanks" that was sure to follow, readying my countenance for a magnanimous and gracious smile, as in It's nothing, really, I spread culinary knowledge everywhere. But I was not thanked, and Sam was calling me, so I grabbed my green grapes and headed out satisfied with my good deed for the day.

My Mission: To fight food misconceptions wherever they may be! Join me!

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